We see it happen all the time, even the strongest and longest of relationships fail and fall apart completely. It occurs with the strongest of people because nobody is perfect and we all make mistakes. This is going to be both personal and general because I am going to mention a few instances on how one of these things affected my relationship.
These are going to be the six most common mistakes that end even the strongest of relationships.
1. Thinking your relationship is the source of all your happiness
Some people get so deeply involved in their relationships that they start seeing it as their only source of joy in the world. That burden is an impossible one to bare for any person regardless of how much they love you; no one should be seen as the source of all your happiness because no one will ever be able to live up to that level of expectation no matter the amount of love they have for you.
Always remember to find happiness in yourself before you go looking for pleasure in others. Be happy with who you are, with the life you live, with the obstacles you’ve tackled, and bring out the joy from all of these elements; then, you can SHARE that happiness with your partner for a very long-lasting and healthy relationship.
2. Thinking that broken trust can’t be brought back again
When someone breaks your faith, it hurts, it hurts more than we know to handle, but it happens, and we all go through it. But the key here is to remember how much you love the person; if you like them enough, then you need to have faith in the trust you can remake with your partner.
It’s not going to be an easy task, every next day your mind will tell you to stop working so hard on what can’t be fixed, but slowly and gradually the trust you two once made will come back, maybe not in the stainless form it once was in, but in a fixed state that can be groomed and made stronger than ever. So never lose the faith so quickly.
3. Thinking that relationships should be easy
Relationships aren’t easy; they are the hardest to maintain and stabilize for an extended period. When you want to love someone, be prepared for the world you’re entering, because it’s not an easy one in any sense of the word. Easy relationships end as quickly and as easily as they start. Genuine and pure relationships will have a LOT of ups and downs, maybe more downs than ups.
Authentic relationships also require a lot of sacrifice and change, change you might not like, so be prepared to change something about yourself when the time comes. Know that relationships are the most beautiful things in the world. Likewise, they’re also not a walk in the park.
4. Thinking that it’s okay to lie “a little”
Lying is wrong, regardless of the details. Your lie may be tiny and harmless, but it’s still a lie. And once you let yourself be okay with “lying a little,” you’ll slowly move towards the direction of “lying a lot.” One lie leads to another lie, and you’ll soon find yourself in a ruthless web of lies, and you have no way to free yourself from that horrible web.
So don’t lie; don’t, the truth may have harmful consequences at first, but they let you move on without the fear of hiding something and lying about it.
5. Not able to share enough time with your partner
I’ve seen some of the most robust relationships break and fade away due to lack of time shared from one side. When you’re with someone, you start a life with them, there’s no “me” anymore, there’s “us,” and you need to stay in that frame of mind throughout your relationship if you want to make it work.
You need to make sure you have enough time to not make your partner feel ignored or God forbid, jealous. If you’re someone who can sometimes get “very busy,” don’t commit to anyone, work on your routine, and manage your time first. Remember, time is one of the most precious gifts you can give someone, and it’s one of the pillars of every relationship.
6. Not being able to move on and start life anew
The past is scary; the history is filled with torment and heartbreak. The history will live with you and make you forget your present if you give it the power to. And it becomes more painful when you drag someone along with you, someone who keeps trying to make you happy, but you keep moving back to the sorrows of your past; it’s very hurtful because I’ve been through it.
Whatever happened in your past isn’t your partner’s fault, and they can NOT be blamed for the sorrows you went through in your past, don’t give them the burden they can’t carry. Make sure you learn to forgive and forget, and then start life fresh and anew with your partner, with the amount of love and care they deserve.